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Bug-themed Party
Posted at: 2009-06-09 01:08:22
Original ad:
We are hosting a 5th birthday party for our son and his friends. It`s a "bug themed" party and we`re looking to hire someone who can bring a few bugs/spiders (maybe under glass?) to the party and educate the kids for about 20 minutes (we`re talking 5-year old attention span). The party is at the end of June. Please contact me if you have experience with and access to bugs and can create a fun learning experience for the kids.
Timmy Tucker to ****************@**********.org

Hey there,

I have access to about twenty black widow spiders, and about 50 brown recluse spiders. For $200, I can release them at your party, and everyone can enjoy them. They are great for kids! I know a lot about insects from my job. I worked in an office on the first floor that had cheap windows, so I always had to kill bugs. I can tell you how to kill anything from a stink bug to an African burrowing scorpion. I can give a small speech to your party about this.

Also, for an extra $50, I can release a bag of wasps in your house to really give it that insect theme that you are looking for.

I look forward to hearing from you,

Showing comments 1-25. View all comments
Bessie (2017-01-10 14:25:59)
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RichardBig (2016-11-17 16:51:30)
I am crazy about this T-shirt. I ordered 4. And now, I want it more. It drives me mad!!! Click for info: Thx!!!
George (2014-02-27 16:48:20)
Not as funny when they dont reply.. it just looks like you're bragging about your own email.. fail
deloto (2014-01-06 01:00:15)
Pour them with hot water, salt, bring to a boil and cook over low heat
Shroom207 (2013-04-30 20:52:36)
"For $200, I can release them at your party, and everyone can enjoy them." No. You should put them in a bag. And once you get too there place. Throw the bag at there ceiling fan.
Steve (2012-12-11 12:38:29)
I have a party at my place with dinosaur theme. Please get me a lot of them.
Jrod31 (2012-11-22 21:35:54)
Wow these early ones fucking suck dick
Chris (2012-10-17 09:31:31)
Hey can you do that at my party, that sounds awesome ,let me know
LOL (2012-09-15 22:52:47)
He needs to not go all in in the first reply. Like first of all say ive got all you need then make the jokes.
Smarter than Bob (2012-09-09 18:12:16)
[The joke] [Bob's tiny little head, with a pea-sized brain inside]
bob (2012-08-27 22:43:15)
toes (2012-05-08 15:14:17)
this got off too sarcastic too fast. It crashed before it had a chance to get off the ground. Funny concepts though!
anonymous (2012-02-29 13:05:51)
Apparently some of you idiots didn't even read the damn ad before commenting. "we`re looking to hire someone who can bring a few bugs/SPIDERS..." spiders may not be 'bugs' but they still qualify as spiders you morons!!
Brendan9895 (2011-12-01 05:55:57)
Spiders are arachnids, bugs are sucking insects, looks like you're unqualified :(
Justin (2011-11-27 22:53:40)
You're site and book inspired me to get a little "penpal" xD
Andrew (2011-11-24 02:28:55)
@GL No one ever said that they were.
Danielle (2011-08-31 22:52:27)
LOL! In stitches after the release them part. Too bad I didn't see this ad earlier. I have bug connections. X-D
DoucheBagEmails (2011-08-01 03:49:13)
Haha i enjoy your emails, even though i make some of my own
GL (2011-07-24 18:04:46)
I couldn't laugh because I was obsessing over the fact that spiders are not insects.
Damnit (2011-07-22 12:41:48)
Carl owed me $50.
I lost it.. (2011-07-16 20:00:35)
Within the first few words! hahaha!
bob (2011-07-01 15:35:46)
i hate it when he posts his emails that dont get any response.
dayum (2011-06-10 12:54:54)
Madness?? THIS IS SPARTA!!
I lost it @ (2011-06-06 03:30:16)
a "BAG" of wasps. who on earth provides a Bag of wasps at a childrens party, or released into your house for $50! madness.
ret (2011-05-04 11:51:39)
lol, he went all in, in the first paragraph. That's why they didn't even bother replying. still funny lol

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