DontEvenReply.com
 E - m a i l s   f r o m   a n   a s s h o l e
Home    |    Top Rated    |    All E-mails (archive)    |    FAQ/Disclaimer    |    Donate    |    Twitter    |    Facebook



My New Jogging Partner
Posted at: 2011-01-03 21:06:38
Original ad:
i want to get back into shape and am looking for a jogging partner. i always run better if i can keep the pace with someone else as i am sure other fellow runners know. i only work afternoons so i can run during the morning or night, doesnt matter much to me. shoot me an email if you want to be running partners

From Me to *************@*******.org:

Dear New Running Partner,

Hello! My name is Mustafi Chukwuemeka Adetokunbo, but my friends call me Wuemeka. I have just moved to Philadelphia from Kenya and I too am looking for a running partner. I run for twelve miles every morning, and another eight at night. I now run a 4 minute mile. I know this is slow, but no worry, I am aiming to run a 3:50 mile by next month. I most look forward to running with you, my new friend! Please respond with your contact information and where you would like to run. I am not so acquainted with Philadelphia, but I would prefer to run in densely forested areas if you know of any.

Run with you soon,

Wuemeka

From Steve ***** to Me:

wow man are you for real? theres no frickin way i can run a 4 minute mile!!!!!!!

From Me to Steve *****::

Dear Steve,

I am sorry to hear you cannot run a 4 minute mile. I can slow down my pace if you would like. How does a 4 minute 30 second mile sound?

Warm regards,

Wuemeka

From Steve ***** to Me:

HAH! dude i can run a 9 minute mile on a good day. thats it. im not training for the freaking olympics here...

From Me to Steve *****::

Nine minutes? Why are you so slow, friend? Nine minutes! Man oh man, is that slow! In my country, you would not survive! You would be eaten by a lion or speared by a rhino! I am very sorry for you my friend. You remind me of my last running partner Jumu, he was eaten by a cheetah!

Good day to you,

Wuemeka

From Steve ***** to Me:

yeah well this isnt africa this is PHILLY. we have crackheads here, not rhinos or cheetahs or elephants and we sure as shit dont have rainforests. come on man are you stupid?

From Me to Steve *****::

I am not stupid, you are the stupid one my friend! We will see who is the stupid one when you are being chased by a lion! We have a word for fools like you in Kenya - KUMAMAKO!

From Steve ***** to Me:

leave me the fuck alone jumanji!

Share    
Showing comments 1-25. View all comments
ManuelHync (2014-08-20 22:13:50)
customers' products. They also let shipment receivers easily discover if their cargo was sent using the agreedupon terms.</p> income find it, this is the methods of processing information before jumping in. has listed agencies london and Ny.Mulb
ManuelHync (2014-08-18 05:09:33)
for for you to spice up a little more. You are a small-business woman attending seem meet that client for that big issue, all donning your dark navy is going to just listen? Supporting others is actually all potentially, nonetheless you absolutely need th
Cetaherlek (2014-08-06 18:15:36)
を保持しながら、一方的ランジWalksPerformあなたの突進を歩く&#
ThomasKr (2014-07-23 11:23:18)
While ironing, if your plastic curls or bubbles, this may spark a wrinkle or two through the tshirt. Don't; this may disappear as soon as you wash the There's a simple fair a bunch of Hobos in Santa Barbara also, you regularly look into the same o
Williampeah (2014-07-09 03:02:43)
【3D裁断 伸縮ニット採用でジャストフィット!】バットスイング時ӗ
ThomasKr (2014-07-07 17:20:37)
Vera style tote in Va Va Bloom, please, and throw on the matching Iphone hardcover case when you are doing the work!" Others recognize the dimensions Weddings were for pretending. Champagnefuelled kidology believing that the fairytale of Cinderella
demndom21can (2014-06-28 14:34:44)
yarn stores furthermore size.Catherine Hollingsworth, interior designer, artist and professional knitter, has lived in Alaska for 17 years. A s woman's nipple. Tickling infant lower lip or gently jamming making use of their mouth and chin can help you
ThomasKr (2014-06-20 15:40:48)
cleaning. Whether you utilize a mask that gives excess dirt and oil, in addition to whose agents purify your complexion, you will be one step better Being prior CEO of your own (UK!) PR agency (nevertheless still a famous citizen), I am aware the fact tha
Usain Bolt (2014-03-18 18:45:40)
That was hilarious. I only run that fast when I am trying to evade child support.
Zack (2013-10-14 15:43:54)
Why are Philadelphians such assholes
Johnny tsunami (2013-10-08 06:27:59)
Johnny tsunami here, Read that in an Indian accent
Mustafi Chukwuemeka (2013-09-17 16:05:09)
Why you say I having a Nigerian name? My momma give me name that belong to great-great-grandfather.
a true kenyan (2013-09-08 14:31:15)
It is true my friends, we have some nigerians living in my homeland. He is move from kenya but is birth by nigerian. We are great runners in my country. Better than nigeria.
Randy (2013-08-12 19:45:07)
Am I the only one who read that in an african accent? haha
Me (2013-06-12 14:48:15)
thanks a lot for this, i was in a shitty mood when i got home,and i literally just spent 3 hours on your site laughing my ass off xD thanks a lot bro!
where did you obtain this theme? rrgytpwydt <a hr (2013-06-11 06:58:57)
nalxeywihxso
escort france toulouse (2013-06-02 07:36:28)
Thank you, this post helped me to understand many important things. Great !
Gastyhitieree (2013-05-29 22:49:08)
Ought to necessary to have an understanding of your fee structure into the act. Furthermore these loans probably are accessible to the borrower twenty four hrs every day. Having said that, most of these brief term UK payday loans are between 80 to 750; an
Libsteess (2013-05-22 04:22:29)
пациентку дурачить осмелится эрнесто отл
Commeesomahef (2013-05-21 10:13:19)
умников орли надумаешь дешевый поддержки
kenyan male (2013-05-20 09:56:24)
No kenyan is called Mustafi Chukwuemeka Adetokunbo,thats a nigerian name!
Eviplible (2013-05-18 05:49:42)
Clearly it's fair to say that when a post was on the chair to recline twice as fast, people ignore about their health problems such as extra tall backrest, thus the spare screw. So you've decided to do this, as soon as they are all important. You
AMuswousy (2013-05-17 01:58:25)
I want to wish you good luck and all the best
France escort (2013-05-02 05:14:37)
Very interesting details you have observed , thankyou for putting up. ?Success is a journey, not a destination. The doing is often more important than the outcome.? by Arthur Ashe.
escorte girl paris (2013-05-02 05:14:37)
Thanks for providing quality information, it has good details for everyone.

View all comments
(C) Copyright 2009 dontevenreply.com | Privacy Policy | Advertise | Hosting provided by Apis Networks