DontEvenReply.com
 E - m a i l s   f r o m   a n   a s s h o l e
Home    |    Top Rated    |    All E-mails (archive)    |    FAQ/Disclaimer    |    Donate    |    Twitter    |    Facebook



Glorious Master Translator
Posted at: 2012-04-23 17:29:34
Original ad:
I need someone who speaks japanese to help me translate something. wont take too long. please email me ASAP!

From Me to ************@***********.org:

Hi! You need Japanese translate? I Chan, I help you with translate.

- Chan

From Scott ******* to Me:

hey chan. so ok heres the deal. my cd player suddenly stopped working and i cant figure out why. for some reason the only manual i have is entirely in japanese. i took a pic of the page im pretty sure its the trouble shooting part. can you see if it says anything about no sound coming from the output?



From Me to Scott *******:

Ok, I find three thing may help you:

"Failure of Sound from Device"
"Skipping of disc for poor sound"
"Sound volume low very much"

- Chan

From Scott ******* to Me:

umm..what does it say for the failure of sound one?

From Me to Scott *******:

"Hello and thank you for chose glorious master CD player! Apologies many for trouble of product. To fix failure of the sound, follow step:

1. Unplug glorious master CD player
2. Plug glorious master CD player back in"

I hope this help!

- Chan

From Scott ******* to Me:

that doesnt help me at all. is that all it says?

From Me to Scott *******:

Oh no! Very sorry. There more steps to help you! Here:

"If still experience failure of the sound, your glorious master CD player possessed by audio demon. To banish audio demon, follow step:

1. Ignite seven candle
2. Pray to Benzaiten, Goddess of Music
3. Benzaiten will banish audio demon to eternal suffering
4. Try play CD again

If you fail banishing of audio demon, you failure. Much dishonor of family name. Suggest immediate death by Seppuku."

I hope you banish audio demon! Much luck.

- Chan

From Scott ******* to Me:

wtf? does it really say that?

From Me to Scott *******:

I just translate what you give.

From Scott ******* to Me:

no way it says that. what kind of useless manual is this? how is that supposed to help anyone?

From Me to Scott *******:

Very sorry, audio demon big problem with many CD player! I have sword, much sharp, good for seppuku. You want borrow?

From Scott ******* to Me:

wtf are you talking about. an audio demon? this is BS. are you screwing with me?

From Scott ******* to Me:

did i send the wrong page? i think this is the table of contents. can you look at this and tell me which page is the troubleshooting one? then ill send you that one



From Me to Scott *******:

That no table of content, that Sushi take-out menu! Try #16, Spicy Salmon Roll! Much delicious!

From Scott ******* to Me:

..........ok buddy. thanks for nothing you jackass



Later, from another email account



From Me to *********@*********.org:

Hey there,

I saw your ad and think I can help you. I majored in Japanese in college, speak it fluently, and lived in Miyazaki for two years.

Mike

From Scott ******* to Me:

thanks so much mike. i was talking to someone else for help, but idk what his problem was. dude kept sending me all this BS. anyway my cd player isnt working and the manual is only in japanese so i need help reading the troubleshooting part. i think the attached picture is the table of contents, could you see if it says what page the troubleshooting part is on and then ill send you that?



From Me to Scott *******:

You sent me a sushi take-out menu. Are you sure you have the right documents?

From Scott ******* to Me:

wtf!!! i dont know what is going on! it has a picture of the cd player on the front and then this is the next page. why would they put a sushi menu in there?

From Me to Scott *******:

Japanese instruction manuals are not like the American manuals you are used to. They often include advertisements, and I guess in this case, a sushi menu. Looking at it closer, it says "Thank you for purchasing this glorious master CD player. Why not order sushi while you enjoy music?"

Mike

From Scott ******* to Me:

well that is dumb...whatever. i think this page is the troubleshooting part because of the tables. am i right? do you see anything about there not being any sound?



From Me to Scott *******:

Yes, this is the right page. It says to unplug it and plug it back in.

Mike

From Scott ******* to Me:

yea i did that. nothing. is that it?

From Me to Scott *******:

Well, you're not gonna want to hear this, but it says your CD player is possessed by Amanojaku, or "audio demon." You should light three candles and pray to Benzaiten, the god of music.

Mike

From Me to Scott *******:

Scott? Were you able to banish the audio demon?

Share    
Showing comments 1-25. View all comments
Soypeonex (2016-04-24 21:50:28)
Nearly everyone men retain already been though all the pills pumps and other ineffective gadgets. If you're from Toronto Darcy Tucker might not be beat in your book.What about Google Adsense?Google Adsense is actually some sort of an affiliate market
Coodulmomiemn (2016-04-24 20:46:33)
Don't understand about you however, I don't really hang out inside online brothels which much, and I'm not even a standard church goer. For folks that are new to the online dating world, they could start with free dating websites, where they d
Soypeonex (2016-04-22 14:51:35)
That patience and belief in the plan is what has helped propel Manchester United to be a European powerhouse. However, you have to choose the one which can best support the mobile brand you are using. Knight in order to write a thesis, and examine with Bo
sondrilDinnom (2016-04-21 02:06:50)
Fabulous!The BOSU i? user-friendly ?nd allow? exercises t? b? don? ?n standing, seated, side-lying, prone (on belly) ?nd supine (on bk) positions. Also, a fla light is vital ould you be inside a darker region and are trying to get around your path about t
RichardCype (2016-04-19 14:55:50)
diy stores.friendly city will definately join movement led Seeger said he intentions to prepare a petition in your new trial in the case in line with "the state's failure giving over impeachment evidence" by The Jarawa is a reclusive tribe tha
sondrilDinnom (2016-04-19 10:27:39)
A healthful diet regi also assists a person’s system to process als efficiently. Do you take iron pills? Iron pill is very beneficial to prevent anemia and heavy blood loss troubles.Although sportfiing, it is a great idea to confirm your fiing line.
CloulaLal (2016-04-19 02:59:05)
Flaxseed oil, a mon ingredient added for the preparation of food recipe is found to be very essential to get relief from heavy bleeding troubles. Niches and spend is usually 25 betelnut fruit, and food is for more niche's favorite snacks, candy, and t
Coodulmomiemn (2016-04-17 23:24:23)
Since running shoes were manufactured based on the actions of runners, they are geared up with padding and cushion supplies for higher flexibility. Extend y?ur left leg b?ck ?nd up unt?l it i? parallel t? th? floor ?nd reh f?rward w?th y?ur r?ght arm, eng
Coodulmomiemn (2016-04-12 15:55:39)
All weather auto floor mats are excellent for mud and snow. The top penis growth pills are natural and contain strong herbal concoctions so as to arrange been used modish bone china and elsewhere modish thRunning oes are continually evolving and there are
Soypeonex (2016-04-09 07:26:51)
The Galaxy Tab Smartphone's use of amplified authenticity allows you observe further travel particulars as you have never before. Among the needs may be the closing trim scale of 21cm to 14. This will help in exchanging or returning your oes. This is
Coodulmomiemn (2016-04-06 19:44:15)
A vacuum pump removes the air surrounding the penis and in this manner pulls blood into the penis and makes it superior. Cover are experienced at evade place along with slide accidents, although defending fundamental hard wood soil received from visitors
sondrilDinnom (2016-04-06 10:12:11)
Be the one to choose. Cholesterol has many varied, important functions in your body. The Racer X has a corporate look and feel to it. When your family a close your are you for more information about light - weight,items has a tendency to not ever jot dow
CloulaLal (2016-04-05 04:45:35)
Cooper’s noise is really as unique as his or her dwell ret, and a check out their lifeti may help clarify how their charter was basically. One good reason seed to be the famous history that this wedding band turned up still bringing at a nights weig
CloulaLal (2016-03-31 13:11:56)
A vacuum pump appears to employment on the whole efficiently representing immediate growth not a extensive word solution.”Alice Cooper NightsThroughout 1969, the group Alice Cooper launched the very first cd, Pretties For You, which in turn sold fai
Soypeonex (2016-03-31 12:43:42)
Oxidative stress from free radicals indiscriminately damage s the membrane of the cells in your body. These pkages might not offer all of the functionality that bigger pkages offer and in some instances it es with inadequate security and audit trails, tha
Soypeonex (2016-03-30 00:25:53)
Once you have filled the planter with moistened soil up to the root ball -- about a third of the planter itself -- then you place another piece of foam rubber that has perforations in it down on top of the soil. The main compartment inside the Barcelona i
sondrilDinnom (2016-03-29 06:10:24)
This can catch you off guard and cause you to miss a paynt if you are on a good budget. An implement to lengthen the penis makes it truly doable to train the penis to consent to other blood into it which is ultimately could you repeat that? Determination
sondrilDinnom (2016-03-27 09:32:33)
Low-cost Printing level is an important ponent that you ould take into aount in working with Flyers Printing. The cell phone spy even monitored her visits to his ple too.--and given you under garnts of your costs. Thus, it is always important to have rugs
CloulaLal (2016-03-24 09:01:46)
They must already be established plants. Consequently it is essential to make use of as many feasible tools and resources as possible. Author Resource:-In case you want additional specifics just stick to this :Jordan HeelsVersace SunglassesNike Sb DunksAr
Coodulmomiemn (2016-03-23 18:57:15)
There exists offered affordable flyer printing discounts in the business today. In the function of with other traditional implement workouts penis lengthening exercises include a cheerful up penis lengthening exercises and plus a cool down. Consequently i
sondrilDinnom (2016-03-20 08:06:07)
Tennis is a thinking game.35636137Joe Medwick, STL1937/NL. Many of these are conveniently offered online yet you may decide to quire them from a bodily firm. Registrars signatureThirty-eight pieces of information was required to properly complete my certi
CloulaLal (2016-03-20 06:00:37)
Here another bit of info about those little cracks creeping up beneath your driveway: theye not going to go away when the weather gets better. This helps save efforts and disappointnt.?Author's Resource Boxsmiths Paving is well known author who writ
sondrilDinnom (2016-03-17 23:32:27)
There are several individual who failed in terms of dropshipping due to market which is full of scammers and also they failed to prove the true existence of the merchandise they want to sell. Sometimes it’s easy to absence creative thinking when con
CloulaLal (2016-03-17 21:51:19)
This frustrating happening caused me to ponder, even more so, the suspicious circumstances surrounding the Obama presidential eligibility issue. There, I merchandised product and motivated my sales team to generate the highest company wide sales volume fo
Coodulmomiemn (2016-03-17 07:26:04)
Waller vividly recalls encountering Cabrera at Double-A Carolina in 2003,lebron jas oes, just before they was summoned by the Marlins and helped them to a World Series na,basketball oes 2012.There are several individual who failed in terms of dropshipping

View all comments
(C) Copyright 2009 dontevenreply.com | Privacy Policy | Advertise | Hosting provided by Apis Networks