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Rude Phone Salesman
Posted at: 2010-12-05 23:25:01
Original ad:
White iPhone 3G network 16 gig for sale - great condition comes with usb/home charger and screen protection case. $350 *******@gmail.com

From Me to *******@gmail.com (Dec 6 9:38 PM):

Hey,

Is your iPhone still available?

Mike

From *******@gmail.com to Me (Dec 7 3:24 AM):

yes.

From Me to *******@gmail.com (Dec 7 3:25 AM):

What the hell is wrong with you? Do you have any idea what time it is?

From *******@gmail.com to Me (Dec 7 3:29 AM):

uh...its like 3:30. whats the problem?

From Me to *******@gmail.com (Dec 7 3:34 AM):

Yeah, 3:30 in the morning, prick! Both my wife and I have to get up for work at 6 and you just woke us up. My wife suffers from sleep anxiety and probably won't be able to fall back asleep. Couldn't this have waited until the morning?

From *******@gmail.com to Me (Dec 7 3:37 AM):

how is that my fault? its not like i called you. i just got home from the bar and saw your email so i responded. its email...who cares what time it is? how could that wake you up?

From Me to *******@gmail.com (Dec 7 3:42 AM):

Oh, so in your drunken stupor you decided it would be a good idea to wake up my entire family at 3:30 in the morning? I have my computer hooked up to a 7.1 surround sound system, and Outlook plays a sound every time I receive an e-mail. It damn near rattled the house when you sent it. You woke up our three month old baby and now he is crying.

I have a meeting with some big-time clients today, and now I am going to be falling asleep in the meeting. Thanks a lot, douchebag.

From *******@gmail.com to Me (Dec 7 3:44 AM):

hey look faggot its not my fucking fault you leave your computer on loud as fuck in the middle of the night. you must be real fuckin dumb. you have a baby and a wife with sleep problems and you think that is a good idea? fuck you guy

From Me to *******@gmail.com (Dec 7 3:48 AM):

I don't like your attitude, pal. First you wake up my entire family, and now you curse me out? This is unacceptable. By the way, my wife was so distraught from you waking her up that she accidentally microwaved our baby's milk too long. The baby was scalded with burning hot milk, and now we have to go to the hospital. I hope you are happy with yourself. Is this how you normally sell iPhones on the internet?

From *******@gmail.com to Me (Dec 7 3:55 AM):

yes, i always sell phones by waking up idiot families and burning babies with milk...NO

boy are you fucking retarded! fyi this is the first and last time i will ever try selling something online, now i know why peope dont use this shit- because only RETARDS use it!

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Dezo (2013-09-10 07:54:03)
This idea was lame. Not fun at all.
sexy bitch (2013-09-08 14:57:34)
Quote:"now i know why peope dont use this shit- because only RETARDS use it!" He just called himself a retard, priceless
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keithmgr (2013-06-25 20:06:12)
Dude i remember when you started the topic on this idea on eti. Glad to see you have done well and thanks for the laughs...lulz
anonymous (2013-06-14 12:02:45)
FAKW
Julia (2013-04-30 18:01:30)
This is the all time best one.
ardin (2013-04-11 03:05:17)
this made my day "fyi this is the first and last time i will ever try selling something online, now i know why peope dont use this shit- because only RETARDS use it!" welcome to internet.
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lmfao.....dis is sooo damn funny
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anon (2013-02-04 18:22:54)
"damn near rattled the house" hahaha
Ryan (2013-01-29 01:38:16)
Omg how is this not on the Top Rated list?? One of the best ones, I laughed my ass off
anonymous (2013-01-23 00:57:49)
"I have my computer hooked up to a 7.1 surround sound system, and Outlook plays a sound every time I receive an e-mail." Loving how utterly ridiculous this is, yet the guy doesn't call him out on it. :P
dkfaja;erogk (2012-12-30 12:12:52)
hahahah "fuck you guy"
Mary (2012-12-18 17:58:24)
@Brandon, are you my uncle Brandon? Because that sounds like something he would say.....
Brandon (2012-12-07 14:45:05)
100% the buyer's fault lacking common sense.
Matthew Matyi (2012-11-29 22:24:41)
One less marketer online. You do a service to us all.
anonymous (2012-10-26 02:48:46)
"idiot families" haha hey now
fuck (2012-10-19 14:06:10)
fuck
Nobody (2012-10-12 20:34:28)
At least he learned a valuable lesson.
what... (2012-09-22 23:33:00)
...a coincidence. You're craigslist scarred the poor skinhead for life.
Josh (2012-09-01 15:26:26)
One of the best fucking awesome !!!! So funny !
Genie (2012-08-21 11:06:56)
microwave part was hilarious, but i hope that he send back an email that it was for a prank
Enna (2012-08-04 05:15:29)
Obviously NOT the seller's fault..
Leah (2012-07-29 18:52:13)
not sure why people think the seller is in the wrong
Dizzy (2012-07-27 17:35:05)
"you have a baby and a wife with sleep problems and you think that is a good idea?" XD i was thinking the same thing
th3r4te (2012-07-24 22:47:36)
"yes, i always sell phones by waking up idiot families and burning babies with milk...NO" this one killed me
just haha (2012-07-11 07:27:26)
burning milk part was the best!
Dildo (2012-07-08 19:57:26)
"fyi this is the first and last time i will ever try selling something online" SCORE!
sabrina69 (2012-06-25 00:57:51)
HAHAHAAH JUST LOVED IT !!!!!!!!!!
john (2012-06-16 09:17:59)
@anonymous (2012-06-01 05:40:29) if you are really the one who got caught up in this gag you could post his email so we could all troll the troll!
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got cut off
anonymous (2012-06-01 05:40:29)
I just want to clarify to all the readers, that was me selling the iphone. Have no fucking idea how I stumbled upon this. Im a female not a male.. And yea im pretty funny myself and usually will chew up any flamers so dont hate on him for trying, if he wo
anonymous (2012-06-01 05:21:06)
Man that soundsso much like something i would say.. i sold an iphone online.. is there any way to verify the email?
ce (2012-05-31 21:52:41)
Haha!! I love Ur stuff I just read Ur book yesterday, I laughed so hard!! Anyone that bitches about Ur material nd thinks it sux needs to get a damn sence of humor, keep doin what u do!!
Tyler (2012-05-31 09:09:56)
definitely my favorite
Jeffrey Larsen (2012-04-28 10:29:04)
...and accidentally drop on the floor and they ofc explode making a hole on the floor and giving me 3rd degree burns. I'm writing this on the ER. So thanks a lot!
Jeffrey Larsen (2012-04-28 10:26:57)
...Normally no one sends messages in the middle of the friggin night unless it's something hilarious. So they link to this story and it's like 2 AM and the sound plays almost shaking the windows. My heart almost stopped, so I reach for my nitros..
Jeffrey Larsen (2012-04-28 10:24:14)
Wtf? Do you know what time it is in my country? My IRC client plays a sound clip whenever someone sends a message on a channel I'm in. I always have the speakers turned up to eleven 24/7...
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Ai (2012-03-16 06:45:35)
I was just about in tears reading this. What kind of a lunatic hooks up Outlook to a 7.1 surround sound system? Fantastic shit, well done.
i'm fake too (2012-02-18 03:24:21)
I was inspired to try this myself and was pleasantly surprised that people actually responded. I think it has to do with peoples innate desire to have the last word regardless of how ridiculous the correspondence is.
anonymous (2012-02-09 02:22:36)
@friend of bill I hope reddit shits on your chest
Jessie (2012-02-05 13:28:55)
Who really cares if it's real or not? I think you guys are missing the point here. Just saying.
anonymous (2012-02-05 09:46:07)
This website has worst comment section.
anonymous (2011-12-16 00:08:44)
It damn near rattled the house when you sent it... That's where I lost it...that shit is hilarious. The other hilarious thing is "Freind of Bill" who can't spell "Friend" and also rips people for having no life, while taking time
anonymous (2011-12-14 02:34:10)
fucking hilarious couldnt stop laughing
hnhjyjhjgkgjh (2011-12-07 08:31:21)
RICK shut up!!!
rick laperriere (2011-11-17 17:38:26)
Ya the biggest dipshit is the guy who post's that this is'nt real. Where do you acheive such a high level of understanding? Your dumber than the assholes who do believe it is real dipshit!
Annonomous...jk (2011-11-17 14:58:10)
I almost pissed my pants imagining the Email sound and the whole house shaking from it xD
Johnny Eyeball (2011-10-30 16:50:19)
@anonymous & @Freind of Bill You're both equally fucking brain dead for thinking this isn't real. It is, as are all the emails on this site. Now go fucking dock each other. 'Tards.
anonymous (2011-10-26 07:39:12)
Hey "Friend of Bill" No one here thinks it's real. You're retarded for thinking WE think it's real.
bill piasta (2011-10-20 09:43:33)
Fuckin a you
anonymous (2011-10-13 04:30:44)
Fake
NafamachJomia (2011-10-05 19:22:20)
Im Sorry im sad
joe (2011-09-22 15:43:00)
im at work right now. i work at the front desk of a library. everyone in this building hates me for laughing, but I MUST CONTINUE
Vinod Nair (2011-09-20 03:02:10)
COmputer hooked up to a surround sound system? What a dumbfuck
Patrick Bateman (2011-09-19 12:41:59)
K I'm at work right now and I have to STOP reading these. Every few minutes I start shaking trying to contain my laughter. People probably think I'm insane...
Shit head (2011-09-11 01:05:55)
I hate all that sweet shit people put on face book.liars,this is the real world.
Maygee (2011-08-21 23:49:15)
I sell i phones like this all the time
Unumbium (2011-08-01 17:20:08)
Troll on troll combat!
Derp (2011-07-21 17:39:33)
everytime i see one of the commenst where people are really mad i think that this happened to them or this is them and it makes me laugh. seriously, who gets mad at this unless it even happened to you?
@Freind of Bill (2011-07-20 09:17:43)
Umadbro?
Mat (2011-07-18 19:10:23)
motherfuckin awsome! Sublime..
Dane (2011-07-18 13:27:36)
Thought you might go with a racism thing since it was a white Ipod, didn't see that one coming at all.
OMGIJUSTPEED (2011-07-13 23:36:34)
I just peed in my pants a little bit.
Freind of Bill (2011-07-10 03:07:46)
For Gods sake. If you clowns are posting on this thinking it is true. You need a lot opf serious help. OMFG. You are as sad as the lame arse who typed this shit up. I have got no life so I think I will post a blurb about selling an iphone. Farking please
t101ck (2011-07-08 21:54:42)
thanks i just shit myself.
t101ck (2011-07-08 21:53:00)
thanks i just shit myself.
William (2011-06-29 11:34:36)
The end line is brilliant. I don't think he realizes how true this is for his own case.
ObviouslyObvious (2011-06-25 15:07:49)
Lol this was the funniest thing I read all day. I don't get how people can NOT tell that it's a prank...jeez. Shut-ins.
Blue Meany (2011-06-22 12:50:58)
Of course you can use Gmail with Outlook
Myka (2011-06-20 19:23:58)
ahahahahahaah this was the best ive ever read, i really laughed my ass off
Soji (2011-06-15 15:28:35)
"What the hell is wrong with you? Do you have any idea what time it is?"
Jason (2011-06-12 19:42:23)
I've totally had people on CL yell at me for emailing at odd hours. it's not my fault you left your blackberry ringer all the way up while you sleep! (they told me it was for work, well in that case don't mix work and personal email!)
Avguy (2011-06-06 21:53:52)
My bad, I meant Yamaha RX-Z11...google that shit..11.2 surround sound
Avguy (2011-06-06 21:47:26)
Wow...really? People aren't aware that 7.1 has been around a while...hell Yamaha has an RX-V 3800 that does 11.2! Google it, yes, hardly any movies are encoded it in and it's TOTAL overkill, but my point is 7.1 is definately real! Tards
Costrig (2011-06-02 19:48:43)
@Carolyn@Tom you guys are fucking idiots too. First of all he is RECEIVING emails from a gmail acct-- Tom are u saying you can't rec emails from gmail? Car- I have my comp hooked up to 7.1.
luis (2011-06-02 05:57:53)
Who has theee computer hooked up to a 7.1 souround system?
John (2011-05-28 19:15:00)
The people commenting here are dumber than the guy he emailed. There is 7.1 surround and yes you can use gmail with your outlook. MORONS!
nobody (2011-05-28 04:00:48)
It depresses me how many comment posters don't realize there really is such a thing as 7.1 surround sound, and some of us actually hook our computers into the home theater system. Of course I don't leave my amp on and turned up when i go to bed th
Batpack (2011-05-26 06:00:11)
Generally I have a lot of sympathy for people who get their time wasted to any major degree and think it goes too far - but my god you find idiots, the minute you mentioned 7.1 I'd have grinned and either not replied or sent a bit of drunk banter back
FuckHaters (2011-05-25 20:21:18)
LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Fester (2011-05-23 11:59:55)
I suggest eating shit.
tom (2011-05-21 06:16:53)
Has no one noticed that you cannot use outlook with gmail?
confusedyes say... (2011-05-19 19:06:26)
are there really people who dont get that this is an awesome prank joke ? i'm shocked at some of the comments thus far
Emilio (2011-05-18 09:58:15)
What's with all the bad grammar lol
whatever (2011-05-17 01:15:50)
ya piss me off, fuckin jerk, ya get on my nerves!!
daniel (2011-05-12 03:21:11)
wow! i pretty laugh all day! its like my friend dale fucking off my gay friend dalvhin!
haha (2011-05-12 03:07:51)
dale might shit with dalvin! LOL
mousey305 (2011-05-10 14:21:21)
hey mike u mess up son wat would make u think tht u could be smart u r stupid n funhny crap dude u is stupidest person i know
mousey305 (2011-05-10 14:19:13)
man this is very crazy stuff it could kill u from a laughter
samelamename (2011-05-10 02:49:26)
Because only RETARDS use it! AHAHAHA! And that's how you call yourself a retard.
Caroline (2011-05-08 03:13:18)
Why would Mike post something that makes him sound like SUCH an idiot? Who hooks his/her computer up to house-rattling speakers? This is most epic.
Rosco Milosco (2011-05-08 03:07:39)
The comments sections of these posts are surprisingly low brow and unimaginative. Poorly worded and 'American' in a bad way. Just as well the troll emails are so good. Makes up for it
she-ra (2011-05-05 19:14:37)
amazeballz
Conal Rhys Fawcett (2011-04-29 09:09:39)
Late night trolling, I like it.
Anon (2011-04-20 21:02:42)
my f*****g computer does that....I'll forget to turn the sound down...and in the middle of the f*****g night my firewall starts going off because some ARP request Port Scan across the wire...rattles my entire desk...I have a woofer the size a dorm fri
Borden (2011-04-18 22:42:30)
@JimJam there's an outside chance he understand trolling perfectly, and just pwned your ass ;) or he's a retard.
tb (2011-04-17 13:55:25)
giggling until i read the numbers 7.1 - then i screamed with laughter
wtf (2011-04-13 21:11:12)
Hey Mike, you're an idiot. KTHX!
jonkraftsmall (2011-04-12 19:56:12)
Thanks for info
Heather (2011-04-06 07:48:22)
I personally love the, "hey look faggot".
GenLet (2011-04-04 17:10:49)
Hm. What was the prank going to be if he hadn't answered at 3AM?
JimJam (2011-04-02 22:00:43)
@wat are you serious? I don't think you quite understand the concept of trolling....
temporary (2011-04-01 03:29:01)
"fuck you guy" Gets me everytime.
offihoolozY (2011-03-31 17:24:37)
everibody common to my site
Guitarded (2011-03-30 17:06:30)
Wat.... you're an idiot lol
wat (2011-03-30 16:04:59)
The guy selling the phone is completely in the right. Who the fuck leaves their speakers on overnight? What the fuck's the point? Dumbass, if he doesn't wanna get woken up, close outlook, turn off your speakers, shut the fuck up and go to sleep.
story (2011-03-29 21:43:59)
i need to meet you. you are the only one i understand.
brad (2011-03-28 19:49:52)
goddamn i busted a gut laughing, you owe me a slightly used gut you son of a bitch
LOL (2011-03-22 21:54:17)
Man. I just can't stop laughing no matter how many times I read this.
Deo (2011-03-17 16:15:49)
I sold my dildo online. It came out to $350 bucks. Then I bought an iPhone. Dildo!
YES (2011-03-16 07:26:53)
DUDE IM LIKE SNO HIGH RIGHT NO
GOT420 (2011-03-16 07:24:13)
It is his first and last time selling anything online. Hahahahahaha FUNNY SHIT
spohornonvesy (2011-03-16 07:13:12)
I have a question - can I post this topic?
Hilncore (2011-03-10 22:00:50)
I loved how the pc is hooked on a 7.1 stereo sound!!
Fuck Yeah (2011-03-09 00:02:06)
Big Giant Titties
Good1 (2011-03-07 17:58:32)
7.1 vs 2.1 doesn't make any difference in house waking qualities. Just depends on how loud the volume is. Although 7.1 does 'sound' more impressive ;). I lol'd.
anonymous (2011-02-27 10:18:27)
Tbh i think you got owned.
ScottyD (2011-02-26 14:44:34)
I'm not your guy buddy!
Satanfuck (2011-02-26 09:42:52)
God damn it stop commenting on here it keeps waking me up!
Jeff (2011-02-26 02:23:42)
Very funny! good job
haha (2011-02-24 17:47:48)
fuck you guy!
jayoky (2011-02-21 03:23:11)
Ok lets have some more of this stuff YEEEEA!
Ben (2011-02-20 18:36:48)
Why would some want a 3g in december.
Irorsfark (2011-02-16 23:49:52)
im gay
Ethan (2011-02-14 15:12:29)
So awesome!!!! Haha!!! Genius!!!!
YurBlkDaddy! (2011-02-11 08:41:21)
Very funny!
El (2011-02-11 08:37:25)
Awesome. Love your website!
Tommfrink (2011-02-09 21:29:19)
It amazes me someone would read these and think it has to be realistic. Have you read any of the other emails? I bet they really confuse you. The acid tripping mechanic for instance?
ranshe (2011-02-08 18:31:18)
whats amazing is that he had to literally stay up until the minute he emailed him. nicely done
maybe (2011-02-08 16:40:44)
you all are just humorless goats?
l_j_r (2011-02-08 14:53:21)
been crying my F'in eyes out all day over this ... i might get fired for causing a ruckus if i can't control myself!!!!!
anonymous (2011-02-06 10:48:37)
I get that this is a joke... it's just a really bad one.
Havoka (2011-02-05 13:31:01)
I lol'd, it's just so nutty...I love it. >:D
Cornholio2000 (2011-02-02 05:12:34)
the hater comments are obviously from Apple fanTARDS, lol. this was funny. last reply in email is so true- Android users laff their asses off at iPhone fashionistas!
forreal (2011-02-01 12:38:27)
for real, this pussy is beaking about people online being dumb when he is the most gullible nerd ive ever seen
Umm.... got the joke (2011-01-29 22:43:09)
I still can't believe some commentors don't get that this email is a joke.... yes the guy hooks his computer up to a 7.1 stereo sound and blames the iphone seller for waking him up (sarcasm). Really, do people think around here?
Kasey (2011-01-28 13:03:35)
Wow this was fricken retarded. Not funny. Yes, kinda believable because there really are morons who leave their phones and computers on like that, but still so stupid.
Bronisіaw Kowalsky (2011-01-26 15:11:38)
I like joke, your is good!
N/N (2011-01-25 20:57:02)
Not as good as many other email pranks, but it's okay.
Nobody (2011-01-24 08:54:53)
Who would leave their computer which is hooked to a 7.1 surround sound on and with outlook on if he has a wife with sleep anxity and a baby?? It could easily have been a friend who couldn't sleep.
NALA SHEA (2011-01-22 08:55:02)
It's the idiot selling the phone's fault for waking his OWN family up. i don't like HIS attitude (for false blaming). I hope is phone is still unsold
Victor (2011-01-22 00:28:06)
A good one..
The CC (2011-01-18 18:44:26)
I'm roaring out loud with laughter. Thanks! Classic! TheConstantComplainer.com
mrtesty (2011-01-17 14:31:15)
Delete shis text plz. Sorry
Lafawnduh (2011-01-12 20:50:16)
you so funny, you maka me laugh!
arsen (2011-01-12 11:19:07)
#1 this shit was funny as fuck #2 the guy that keeps his shit up to the point to where it wakes everybody up at the alert of a fuckin email then hes a total TARD #3 the other guys last response was fuckin killer
Bob (2011-01-10 20:42:13)
Meh, boring. It's like trying to take a dump with empty stomach after fasting. Something may come out but it's not even close to the real satisfaction from a good dump.
hahah (2011-01-08 22:56:42)
love this one
Feermonna (2011-01-08 18:14:22)
this is test only .pls del my topic this is test only .pls del my topic
Brochamp (2011-01-05 20:10:28)
If you dont like it dont read it. Bunch of retards. I thought it was hilarious
zs (2011-01-05 10:08:28)
Not funny.... try harder next time.
Me (2011-01-04 23:34:51)
You are an asshole...you should take that as a compliment btw...
Jman37X (2011-01-03 16:34:02)
Wow, you guys are so mean! Am I the only one who finds this funny as shit? You guys need to stop hating on this guy, especially when there's no reason to! In now way at all does he deserve all the hate he's getting.
Hachijj (2011-01-03 14:45:28)
He's holding on to his posts to make u buy the book.get a life u suckers!
.. (2011-01-01 13:09:09)
Yeah calling him an asshole and that is really going to make him post one faster..
Fan Girl (2011-01-01 05:51:02)
I have to say that this wasn't too good. You can do better! Still love ya though. <3
richmay1 (2011-01-01 05:02:30)
Asshole, This is not good enough,one of your poorest efforts...This not funny at all!
Captain Obvious (2010-12-31 10:26:39)
Not funny and with those timestamps, even a fool could conclude a lot. Please try harder next time.
dunkan (2010-12-31 02:09:30)
It was actually his fault for keeping the speakers on but then he got pissed at the phone seller for sending the emails.
ReaganCriedWolf (2010-12-30 23:32:34)
...puter and get on the Internet. I consider this comedy gold because these days, people know about trolls and know how to deal with them. This kind of thing rarely happens anymore.
ReaganCriedWolf (2010-12-30 23:30:34)
Does anyone realize how long it takes to get "troll bait"? It takes for-fucking-ever to find someone that's obviously dumb as fuck, but they still have three brain cells to process the function of sitting their ass on a chair and get on a comp
meh (2010-12-30 19:43:01)
loved this site for a long time but if this is the new funny then I guess this is goodbye.
internettoughguy7687 (2010-12-30 19:18:46)
basically every post here: when is this queer gonna update his faggy site it better be soon because i have a black belt in bjj!!!
fartypants (2010-12-30 15:14:20)
poor effort on this one, not a lol
non (2010-12-30 14:31:26)
this one sucked, ALOT.
George (2010-12-30 07:24:18)
LMFAO
haters? (2010-12-30 03:28:08)
I thought it was funny...
Callie (2010-12-30 00:37:00)
This wasn't funny AT ALL. Yikes.
2011 (2010-12-29 22:16:44)
Since we didn't get christmas post can we get new years post?
HAI LOOK AT ME! (2010-12-29 03:46:22)
HEY GUYS I WANT SOMETHING TO BITCH ABOUT TOO! ANY IDEAS? :D
Brad (2010-12-28 18:08:09)
Also, maybe some of you should read the FAQ. Why are you taking so long to update? I'd rather not post at all than post a shitty one. These things take time. If I do post a shitty one, it is because you guys bitch so much.
Brad (2010-12-28 17:39:02)
It looks like some people don't fully understand the whole point of you trolling these people. It's as if they think you're actually angry at the salesman because he woke up your wife and burned your baby's throat with formula. It's
Lolidunno (2010-12-28 16:42:32)
He called himself a retard. haha.
haha (2010-12-28 12:57:30)
"fyi this is the first and last time i will ever try selling something online" LOL, you totally ruined his future internet sales. now he is going to tell everyone about how the internet sucks.
Honestly (2010-12-28 01:59:02)
Honestly it's the phone sellers fault. Who's to say that spam won't come in in the early morning? Why the hell wouldn't he mute the computer when sleeping?
Santa Clod (2010-12-27 08:04:55)
Hey asshole, was it too much to ask for an update for fricking CHRISTMAS? I guess it was.
Irorsfark (2010-12-25 22:45:36)
delete
for christmas (2010-12-25 17:21:27)
I wanted a new post. I was denied this new post :( love and respect for you still 100%. P.s. Cj is gay
M (2010-12-25 15:42:22)
EVERYONE CHECK OUT MY VERY IMPORTANT OPINION!
No Santa (2010-12-25 11:50:09)
I do not believe in santa anymore
Bust a grumpy (2010-12-25 10:19:36)
hilarious!
Jerry (2010-12-24 21:11:29)
Oh very funny. I mentioned this to a friend who happens to read your low life shit. Posting our e-mails here. You scumbag! Oh, for some reason you don't know how to turn off your speakers at night! Merry Fuckin' Chrismas!
DUDE! (2010-12-24 20:40:17)
You are a genius!!!! You're the Ultimate Troll, Thank you for your work, I can sleep better at night knowing you're out there, screwing with people.
Xmas (2010-12-24 19:46:36)
WTF, its christmas man, people are sellin shit all over and still no updates
MintBerryCrunch (2010-12-23 16:02:45)
you damn near rattled the house!
mojo (2010-12-23 15:46:35)
(cont) maybe you should gain some investigational skills before YOU badmouth others. the point is, this shit is funny. who cares if its real?
mojo (2010-12-23 15:44:40)
ok SD, there are three different dates up there. the 5th (which is apparently when this was posted) the 6th (which is the first email from Mike) and then after midnight, as you so astutely pointed out, is the e-mailers response on the 7th. just sayin. may
anonymous (2010-12-23 14:25:03)
I love this site, it gives me a warm feeling down there knowing your out there
ZZZZZZZZZZZ (2010-12-23 12:59:22)
FAKE
Name: (2010-12-23 08:07:26)
OK, first you refuse to make an RSS feed and then you don't even fucking post an update to Twitter. So I wonder why there's no new posts for two months but in reality there is (though just one). Oh, and a 7.1 bit was just hilarious.
Luis (2010-12-23 06:23:18)
please more
Bailey (2010-12-22 20:52:33)
This was just okay. Not your best. And whats with the date thing? Why does it say you posted on the 5th when you started talking to the guy on the 6th?
schmedley (2010-12-22 18:41:35)
Hey Family Man, ever hear of a plug switch? All of three dollars at Home Depot, plug your audio into that. The phone seller did nothing wrong. Otherwise, I hope you have a really good spam filter on your Outlook.
Lynn (2010-12-22 15:56:37)
I have never had such a serious ab workout in my whole life! Not to mention crying harder than I do at funerals....you are my new hero!
Sarah (2010-12-22 14:48:14)
for the very first thing I ever read from your website....all I can say is LMFAO are you kidding? there's no way this can be real! Two cheers for my new favorite webpage!
absenteeism. (2010-12-22 13:59:21)
ON LOUD AS FUCK! XDXDXDXDXDXXDXDXDXDXDXXD
YouSuckAtKijiji (2010-12-21 21:34:53)
I should hire this fellow to troll people up here in Canada on Kijiji for my site. I'd gladly give 'im half my ad revenue. Which'd be enough for a quarter of a chocolate bar. Or, candy bar as you say in the U-S-of-A, eh.
intellergents (2010-12-21 18:29:59)
wonder what all these people who don't understand what trolling is are doing on this website in the first place. glad to see an update again
Kyle (2010-12-21 13:57:37)
This one is great because the other guy is actualy funnier.
anonymous (2010-12-21 11:04:16)
Theres some seriously dumb people on here.
JasonNT (2010-12-20 17:28:30)
delete plz
Kevin (2010-12-20 17:22:48)
I
Loves It (2010-12-20 12:39:38)
i laughed out loud at the "fuck you guy" hahaha, the other person is NEVER funny, i loved this one hahaha!! "i hope you are happy with yourself" LOL
alexiarv (2010-12-19 22:52:25)
wow i just cried from reading this
anila (2010-12-19 20:12:52)
it damn near rattled the house.
Epicness is my name (2010-12-19 18:00:18)
Dude this is still EPIC! Don't listen to the other posters on here, they don't know what they're talking about.
Roy (2010-12-19 16:15:46)
I almost died laughing
Damn (2010-12-19 13:56:50)
Mike, you lost your touch man, gotta do something bout losing your dick mojo with fucking with people.
SD (2010-12-19 10:36:39)
Are you all fucking stupid? The reason the dates don't match is because he sent the first enquiry BEFORE MIDNIGHT on the 5th, the first REPLY came AFTER MIDNIGHT making it a NEW FUCKING DAY/DATE - THINK before you badmouth someone who is pretry damned
FFS (2010-12-19 07:25:38)
Delete all these rubbish comments, man. This site is becoming a fucking tip.
anonymous (2010-12-18 15:50:52)
This wasn't the phone salemans fault. you are a fucking idiot for leaving your computer on loud. seriously man. you seem like a real duck
Vladimir (2010-12-18 02:54:50)
Lmao I was laughing my ass off :D
unbeknownst (2010-12-17 18:53:26)
LoL ive never seen the word "fuck" so many times on one webpage! AH! i love the internet!
okay (2010-12-17 16:45:31)
yeah man, u suck now.. i used to come here for a laugh.. lame
Back to the Future?? (2010-12-17 11:37:40)
Hey, you are dumb. The original ad posted on Dec 5th. He responded Dec 6th. You are stupid cock sucker that loves gay dick. In your butt.
Captain Lou Albano (2010-12-17 11:36:46)
Hey LIES LIES, you are fucking retarded. The original ad post was put online on the 5th. He responded the 6th. You are stupid piece of shit.
Lies Lies... (2010-12-17 10:23:36)
Comment dates vs posted date conflicts...doesnt even make sense...FAIL DUDE! How can you post on the 5th when the conversation starts on the 6th?
honey (2010-12-16 23:24:37)
i also have my computer hooked up to a surround sound. every time someone comments, it makes a noise, so please do not comment late at a ight....
Canada (2010-12-16 16:09:53)
Gotta give that one to the guy sellin the phone!!
Justice (2010-12-16 15:21:10)
I don't care how long it takes for you to put up new posts. I'll wait! (or I'll just buy the book)
Ricker (2010-12-16 15:03:39)
Surround sound 7.1 hooked up to your computer with outlook running... Brilliant!!! Pretty believable and explains why his wife has sleep anxiety with all the SPAM that must have hit the mail box on previous nights ;)
FIre (2010-12-16 08:16:43)
Keep them up and take your damn time the hell what everyone else says they can wait
Mike Powers (2010-12-16 07:33:27)
Well, now I see why you post less and less. Everyone on the internet is completely retarded and ungrateful, having the nerve to complain about a free service. You people want more posts? Buy the damn book!
Hugh G. Rection (2010-12-16 02:52:14)
POST DATES!!!
:^] (2010-12-16 00:39:27)
I laughed my ass off! Keep em coming when you have time!
Not as good anymore (2010-12-15 17:04:47)
"Fuck you guy" mwahahaha, I love it.
FireStarter (2010-12-15 02:31:21)
Haha you sure changed someone's life with that. Best laugh of day.
beaners (2010-12-14 23:09:16)
its not like youre paying for this shit either. No one cares if you dont like it. you dumb pieces of shit. especially the dumb fuck who cant fuckin read dates.
Richboy (2010-12-14 20:52:01)
This website used to be the shit, what happen, he puts a post up like once a month and there not even funny. I know u can do better
NormalHuman (2010-12-14 20:49:55)
C'mon guys, it might not be as nice as the others, but aren't u guys expecting too much out of this guy, you must understand that he's a human too, he cannot possibly expect to create epic emails all the time, can he?
You are morons (2010-12-14 20:45:39)
Post date is the date of the AD. He responded dec 6 and 7th. How could you respond before the AD was placed. Fuck tards
Gigel (2010-12-14 19:50:20)
Well, at least he learned a lesson.
anonymous (2010-12-14 16:08:07)
I'm sorry i really didnt think this was such a good one. I hope you get your magic back soon!
anonymous (2010-12-14 16:07:26)
I'm sorry i really didnt think this was such a good one. I hope you get your magic back soon!
annonymous (2010-12-14 14:44:08)
I don't get it. How is the phone salesman rude? I was laughing at the ignoramus who would blame an email for basically ruining his life. Failure. Complete.
Mike (2010-12-14 14:40:15)
Beat. Plus there is just toooo much time between emails. Becoming totally irrelevant.
anonymous (2010-12-14 13:40:42)
you guys are fucking retards. look at every email he's put up over the last 6 months. he always changes the date he posted it to fuck with yall. look at the post dates vs the first comment date.
Shirley Phelps-Roper (2010-12-14 12:03:02)
tl;dr
Back to the Future? (2010-12-14 08:22:18)
How was this lame attempt at humour posted (i.e. Dec. 5th) before the emails were actually exchanged (Dec. 6 and 7th)? Time to retire, douche.
anonymous (2010-12-14 07:02:25)
Did anyone else see the irony of the fact that he said "only retards post shit on this"?
chuck (2010-12-14 02:46:35)
It wasn't too bad. If you guys don't like it don't read. No one is holding a gun to your head.
DD (2010-12-13 20:36:39)
The surround sound part is hilarious. Who the fuck would have that? haha.
OGC (2010-12-13 20:09:07)
Weak. Try again.
Fyre (2010-12-13 16:52:37)
(continued) bad
Fyre (2010-12-13 16:52:03)
First one on this site Ive ever read, and at first I thought the guy throwing a fit about waking up was the one that was being made fun of. It was only when I read the other posts that I realized that isn't the case. Not so great, makes yourself look
sammy carpenter (2010-12-13 16:39:29)
This was posted 5th december, however the e-mailing takes place on 6-7th december. Whats up with that?
KingKongKeesha (2010-12-13 14:31:23)
golden - top 10? really? no. fucking weak.
ffffffffffff (2010-12-13 12:08:52)
Fuckin weak
JD (2010-12-13 10:00:32)
Well, I thought this would be the best e-mail ever, until I got to the end.. Too bad the end isn't as good as i thought it would be. But still funny:)
Contest Man (2010-12-13 06:20:28)
WHAT THE FRICK IS UP WITH THE FRICKING CONTEST!!!!!!!!!! IT WAS SUPPOSED TO END IN APRIL!!!!
Lollol (2010-12-13 02:05:43)
Mike, I am in love with you!
RR (2010-12-12 23:21:41)
Oh, and Lauren and Golden are obviously the same morons. Flame on, you cigar-smoking fag.
RR (2010-12-12 23:18:22)
This one sucked the balls of an underaged, underdeveloped donkey. Fuck everyone like r and jon who thinks this was great. I'd complain more because this was the first one in 2 months ... but this is a free site, so whaddya gonna do?
golden (2010-12-12 22:41:17)
dude, idk what everyone else is so sour about, but i thought this one was hilarious. maybe not the best, but certainly top 10.
Wilbur (2010-12-12 21:57:03)
I reckon this was RAD!! All you Dicks talking shit would try and do something half as funny as this, you would all fail miserably, so Fuck Off and let the man work!!
chokenuts (2010-12-12 19:41:20)
I don't see what everyone's bitching about, I thought it was damn funny. Maybe not the best one I've ever seen, but it still made me laugh.
s (2010-12-12 18:16:26)
s
gfdgsdfg (2010-12-12 17:23:19)
I like the older emails. You used to go in it with a plan before you started writing the first reply. Now you just kind of wait for the joke to come to you. :/
anonymous (2010-12-12 17:13:48)
LMAO
Disappointed (2010-12-12 16:53:17)
This one gets the "crappiest email of the year award".
Z (2010-12-12 16:51:59)
Better burn out than fade away they say... So set yourself on fire plz...
auggiedog (2010-12-12 16:01:52)
Where have you been my man??? I had to take this off as my home page because there's not enough new content! This one was pretty good.
Meh (2010-12-12 15:55:41)
This one was pretty weak.
meow (2010-12-12 15:49:56)
Aww I wish it kept going. he should of asked after how muvh the phone would have been
Lauren (2010-12-12 11:04:42)
This is too funny. Honestly, no other website can make me laugh as hard as this one can, and for that, I applaud you fine sir.
Jimmy Tucker (2010-12-12 10:17:50)
Louis Armstrong was perhaps the greatest musician of all time.
dumbbunny (2010-12-12 09:46:41)
Sorry, but this actually does look bad on you. Having your email hooked up to a surround sound system and playing noises when you get one is incredibly stupid.
Harry (2010-12-12 08:25:11)
hmmmmmmmm....i expected much more from this one...
KingKongKeesha (2010-12-12 01:17:07)
most of these are pretty awesome but this one pretty much sucked.
Timmy Tucker (2010-12-12 01:15:15)
I have been a fucking disciple of your site for ages, I love how you can turn any normal situation into a comedy gold mine, but this one... I see where you were going with it, but you totally missed dude. Maybe the next one will be better.
Mr. Derp (2010-12-11 15:15:28)
EPIC
Britt (2010-12-11 13:38:27)
All the bad comments are most likely from the same person. Dont be a hater. It was funny! Please post another soon! :)
jon (2010-12-11 11:44:45)
i L'd my AO
r (2010-12-11 10:16:15)
fuck everybody, this one was great
kderb (2010-12-11 10:13:42)
I like the guy selling the phone, he obviously drinks his face off. I'm sure he was surfing for porn but figured he would multi-task. You convinced him not to sell things on-line, therefore you won!
Menji (2010-12-11 09:20:20)
haha this one was great excellent timing
Bo (2010-12-11 05:00:38)
I like most of these but this one is pretty stupid.
bonogo (2010-12-11 04:22:57)
Telling someone he's slow and that his new releases suck isn't going to make him motivated to change his behavior. I thought it was as genius as his previous posts. And I don't care if the releases come a bit slow, after all we get free lol
anonymous (2010-12-11 01:25:25)
"Fuck you guy! I dont like your attitude pal!" I was just expecting an, I'm not your pal, friend! I'm not your friend, guy! I'm not your guy, pal! and so on and so forth
D (2010-12-11 01:02:39)
is the post time for the ad, or when he posted it on the site
kum n go (2010-12-10 21:09:46)
kinda lame ... and it took ya long enough for a new one
jolene (2010-12-10 20:26:11)
The rude comments are totally unnecessary, though I kind of agree that you have done better. I wouldn't berate you for it. Hey, a-holes, maybe this guy has, I don't know, a life? Better things to do than live to please you randoms? I eagerly wait
anonymous (2010-12-10 19:23:06)
dude you should just disable comments because your fans are pieces of shit
Josh is an idiot (2010-12-10 19:21:50)
"If you don't find this funny, don't read it." Are you serious dude?... That's like saying, "Well if you didn't like the Matrix, then why did you watch it?" The answer is, more than likely, to find out if they liked it.
anonymous (2010-12-10 19:20:24)
i wonder where he was going with this before the guy happened to mail him at 3 AM. LOL this one was great. and fuck that guy below me i loved your book!
You-Let-Me-Down (2010-12-10 18:29:10)
I bought your book and the 60% new material was garbage. If this is something you're going to do take some pride in it.
You-Let-Me-Down (2010-12-10 18:28:15)
I've been coming to this site since its inception and I've got to say, your stuff is getting weak.
really hot blond (2010-12-10 17:41:33)
yes, i always sell phones by waking up idiot families and burning babies with milk...NO...I love this
Fake (2010-12-10 17:33:28)
If you are going to make them up, at least make them worth reading.
solla (2010-12-10 16:52:41)
Actually, disregard that. I reread it and it's fucking hilarious! Good work man! Keep them coming.
solla (2010-12-10 16:48:32)
Kinda boring and I actually felt kinda bad for the guy, which has never really happened before. Not your best work.
MarkL (2010-12-10 16:47:13)
That was great! Loved the scalding milk comment.
anonymous (2010-12-10 16:27:01)
kinda lame, and it took f-ing forever to put up another post, your site is almost useless lately, is maybe 1 post a week too much to ask for?
Phrosty (2010-12-10 16:12:46)
Meh. That one fell pretty flat. We'll just pretend you didn't post this. K?
Dun-can (2010-12-10 15:13:39)
It's funny because he thought that the guy really did leave his computer on surround sound when he sleeps.
john doe (2010-12-10 14:43:08)
Loved it. Keep them coming.
Merball (2010-12-10 13:09:49)
I don't understand how it was posted at an earlier date than it actually happened.
meatcrab (2010-12-10 12:28:39)
it's funny because it's true.
Josh (2010-12-10 10:47:43)
First of all, if you don't find this one funny, DON'T READ IT!!! I thought this shit was hilarious, pretty much because the other guy's responses sound like my old roommate, but if you don't like it that's fine. Dude is doing this FOR
hmmmm (2010-12-10 10:38:27)
how did he anticipate the e-mail coming at 3am? either he had a different idea and changed it..or this is staged
Julian Assange (2010-12-10 09:33:26)
I have told my staff not to release any unpublished email stories from dontevenreply.com. I love reading these and look forward to new emails more than publishing military secrets. Keep it up!
Jebediah (2010-12-10 08:33:02)
Sad to say, but this was the worst one so far. Just not funny at all.
Herr (2010-12-10 05:58:37)
Posted 5.12 and the emails on the post are 6.12-7.12 TIME TRAVELLER!
anonymous (2010-12-10 05:39:06)
the guy was funnier than dontevenreply. owned
Thomas (2010-12-10 04:05:12)
Fucking funny, my mom has hooked her iPad to her dildo
doonkan (2010-12-10 03:52:14)
This is funny because that guy tried to sell an iphone and was blamed for waking up a family late at night with e-mail, as if he called.
This is bad (2010-12-10 03:18:46)
SO SHIT, YOU TOOK THIS LONG TO POST THIS SHIT? YOU SUCK ASSHOLE GO KILL YOURSELF.
anonymous (2010-12-10 02:27:48)
kim you are the one that sucks big black dick
kim (2010-12-10 02:07:17)
This one sucked, and those of you who thought it was really funny need to either find out what the meaning of funny is or stop swinging from his nuts and be honest with him.
Ralph (2010-12-10 01:50:36)
About fucking time you put up another post.
PL-QC (2010-12-10 01:29:54)
''yes, i always sell phones by waking up idiot families and burning babies with milk...NO'' For once, it's the other guy who had the funniest line!
tlewis (2010-12-09 20:32:40)
LMFAO this is one of my new favorites i think
Lol (2010-12-09 17:47:42)
i just noticed the date, Posted at: 2010-12-05
Joe Big Cock Johnson (2010-12-09 15:03:06)
April: You are a filthy cunt. How fucking stupid can you be. Go back to dildoing your loose fuckhole all day. Dumb slut.
STFUFAGGOTS (2010-12-09 14:55:32)
This was hilarious, good job.
Josh Bovier (2010-12-09 14:52:56)
MOAR Please!
pugnac (2010-12-09 14:43:36)
Lame. Moron.
dickbukkake (2010-12-09 13:50:23)
yawn
harry (2010-12-09 11:27:54)
Over a month's wait for this? You can do better
dick (2010-12-09 11:23:07)
balls
BILL (2010-12-09 11:22:00)
Need more...
guvna (2010-12-09 10:57:01)
seriously who leaves they're pc hooked up to 7.1 surround sound all night long? I would imagine that's not the only email he gets throughout the night.
anonymous (2010-12-09 10:53:38)
joe he always changes the post dates to fuck with you
joe (2010-12-09 10:46:14)
Why are the dates on the emails after the posting date? Okay, so this must have been last year or before... But, serioulsy, you've held on to this turd for a whole year before posting it while obviously, there are many people waiting for updates. W
Naes (2010-12-09 08:13:07)
Fact: Bears eat beets. Bears. Beets. Battlestar Galactica
Spampy (2010-12-09 07:46:38)
somehow owed to me!!"
Spampy (2010-12-09 07:46:12)
I would disable the comments, it's probably just one person doing all the hating and it's not like feedback is necessary. It's just "not as good as the last one" and "I waited two months and I feel like updates on this site are som
Holy Balls of Steel (2010-12-09 06:39:12)
Hey Mike, long time fan, how about you update some more and maybe I can click an extra few ads this month eh? Tis be the season of giving after all.
me (2010-12-09 03:19:40)
your the biggest dick haha keep up the good work lol
stupid cunt (2010-12-09 02:30:48)
yeah april, you stupid cunt. Go suck a dick
matteyo coreale (2010-12-09 01:01:16)
hilarious
pablo (2010-12-09 00:54:37)
I feel like the other guy was the victor in this situation.
Amy (2010-12-09 00:53:35)
HILARIOUS!!!
Mary Auditore (2010-12-09 00:25:22)
Ahahahahah!! Poor dude!
NINJARAPIST (2010-12-09 00:20:08)
No matter what you post, people always complain about how it "wasn't as funny as the last ones". Dumbasses.
jesterpariah (2010-12-08 23:30:07)
well, this is the worst. A brief waste of time waiting on great humor. I read funnier shit in obituaries.
the other guy (2010-12-08 23:03:50)
the other guy handled it well. actually pretty much owned you. but I'm pretty sure this one was made up anyway.
anonymous (2010-12-08 22:01:46)
That's just great!
anonymous (2010-12-08 21:57:01)
april you stupid cunt, did it ever cross your mind that he probably was going to do something else, and jumped on the opportunity when he saw the time that they emailed him?
april (2010-12-08 21:27:12)
i call BS. how would you have known that he would respond so late? and just a coincidence that you were there as soon as his email came through? not the best...
juice (2010-12-08 20:52:15)
I don't like your attitude, pal.
Wow (2010-12-08 19:37:43)
Lol @ this guy going out to the bar on a Monday night staying out until 3am.
@Frank (2010-12-08 18:22:32)
If you don't wanna be woken up during the night, turn off your fucking smartphone.
eh (2010-12-08 18:18:17)
meh.. not worth the long wait.
eh (2010-12-08 18:18:17)
meh.. not worth the long wait.
Frank (2010-12-08 17:52:46)
Actually this story easily could have been true. In this day with everyone having smartphones, sending an email at 3am isn't better than calling.
WonderSlice (2010-12-08 17:36:43)
think you could go on a major drinking binge so we all can be blessed by your divine sense of asshole-ism??? please and thank you!!
Steve (2010-12-08 17:35:01)
I don't see how this man deserved it.
saraH (2010-12-08 17:33:18)
CLASSSSIC!!!! EPIC EVEN!!!!
Imnot (2010-12-08 17:31:25)
Im Not your guy, pal!
Hurhur (2010-12-08 16:57:09)
Microwave - Wtf?
jimchillino (2010-12-08 16:44:49)
whenever i use my stereo, i set up the volume knob to "loud as fuck"
Woof (2010-12-08 16:35:32)
Great one! Well worth the wait. Great visual with the hysterical wife/scalded baby.
Alex (2010-12-08 15:54:31)
You had me at 7.1
Nard dog (2010-12-08 15:44:42)
Booooooo
big cock man (2010-12-08 15:34:54)
wtf man where are the funny pics!!!!
John (2010-12-08 15:13:36)
Great to see an update, Looking forward to more! Your last email should have been asking if the phone was still for sale...
Hector (2010-12-08 14:23:09)
This wasn't funny.
Tbone (2010-12-08 14:11:52)
Oh man, that is some funny shit. Please post more often, this site has been the best belly laugh I've had in months.
Sal (2010-12-08 13:54:28)
This was not even funny. I think you are trying too hard. You wait FOREVER between posts and THIS is what you come up with? Come on man...
anonymous (2010-12-08 13:47:57)
Lmao, you trolled a guy off the internet forever, you are awesome.
Jubilee (2010-12-08 13:46:00)
the bit about scalding milk is classic mike partlow. i love the little touches like that. there's always some absurd incidental shit that happens that's always the other guy's fault. wouldn't quite be the same without it. still, don't
JD (2010-12-08 13:40:11)
Funny story, though I call BS in it being real because spam comes in any time of the day, spammers don't care.
Hmmm (2010-12-08 13:40:05)
Maybe I should try setting up my laptop up like that
andromeda (2010-12-08 13:08:51)
I love it, cause it's different! :)
Tara (2010-12-08 12:34:43)
Seen better but it was still great! Too long between them though!!
Taint (2010-12-08 12:32:42)
Wow, how lucky are you that this guy replied to you at 3:30 AM and you were able to hook him with the gag! It would have been a shame if he emailed at a normal time when this joke wouldn't have worked LOL!!!1!!111!!ONE!
gj (2010-12-08 12:25:32)
i laughed
MaTt (2010-12-08 12:03:27)
this was funny but your site is losing its epicness :(
Lady Gaga (2010-12-08 12:03:20)
Roma Romama Gaga Ohlala
Mr. Wiggles (2010-12-08 11:26:33)
I waited a whole month for this shit? .... So worth it!
J Walter Thompson (2010-12-08 11:04:48)
J Walter Thompson should get a life
Really? (2010-12-08 10:58:42)
That's what we've been waiting almost two months for? Extremely average
jim (2010-12-08 10:48:31)
haha
roflcopter (2010-12-08 10:32:30)
i liked it. you guys need to chill on the haterade
microwave (2010-12-08 10:25:37)
you should NEVER use a microwave to heat up a baby's milk/formula. Always run the bottle under a warm faucet or let the bottle soak in warm water until it is warm enough to drink. this way you won't scald your baby. enough idiots read this site
puertorican (2010-12-08 10:22:15)
this one is good but dishwasher confusion is the best one EVER.
Chris (2010-12-08 10:15:18)
All of you whining dumbass'. Yall just need to STFU! If you dont think his emails are good enough then trying doing it yourself! I thought this was hilarious. Of course not as good as some of his other ones, but hilarious nonetheless!
bleh (2010-12-08 10:07:16)
bleh
Mission Accomplised (2010-12-08 10:03:39)
1 down, a million or so to go LOL
anonymous (2010-12-08 09:50:50)
funny, i knew where this was going as soon as he asked how an email woke your family up...pretty stellar!
Jarosea (2010-12-08 09:36:03)
This was lame.
Jim (2010-12-08 09:28:06)
what a bunch of whiny bitches, nobody is making you read these so stop complaining if you dont like every one of them.
Not To Shaby (2010-12-08 08:58:38)
all tvs computers and steros should not say max they should say loud as fuck ha classic
lol (2010-12-08 08:57:39)
Comments re harsh, I thought this was quite funny
Layla (2010-12-08 08:55:02)
That was definitely worth the wait. Thank you sir!
Jocke (2010-12-08 08:50:06)
1. Awesome. 2. Worth the wait (I even managed to visit some other sites since the last post). 3. As good as it used to be.
Michael (2010-12-08 08:38:21)
I will not argue with people who didn't like the last E-Mail conversation. Because it's not gonna change, but I see that half of the posters are as stupid as the people Mike writes.
Crying laughing (2010-12-08 08:34:39)
Man that was good. I will never send an email after 1 am again.
Really? (2010-12-08 08:26:11)
This was the best you could come up with after all this time?
amanda (2010-12-08 08:05:21)
dunno what everyone's problem is, this had me giggling like a moron
@really (2010-12-08 07:30:27)
This guy sucks donkey dick
@josh (2010-12-08 07:29:37)
I created facebook so I can insult whoever I want. I'm 26 and a billionaire bitches. This was fucking awful. Don't post shitty crap again or I'll take your fb account away
Really... (2010-12-08 07:25:23)
I mean really....??? We wait over a fucking month and you post this shot. I would have preferred nothing at all Ya bitch
Angie (2010-12-08 05:23:36)
"yes, i always sell phones by waking up idiot families and burning babies with milk...NO" Haha best line ever.
Niggerpants (2010-12-08 04:54:33)
This is what we waited two months for? You're losing your touch. I bought your book and it's quality, but this is seriously shit.
rudy (2010-12-08 04:50:08)
pretty damn good....also might be better for the site if you picked some fan submitted stories..at least the content would be updated more often
Fred (2010-12-08 04:12:46)
haha good one! I like thinking about the guy getting back drunk from the pub. wtf with this retard and his family ??!! :-)
narf (2010-12-08 04:09:07)
I like how he told you that he was never going to sell anything online again, like it affected your life.
anonymous (2010-12-08 04:00:12)
fuckin awesome
m (2010-12-08 03:46:55)
well nice to know the site's still alive, but this wasn't exactly a high point.
Andrew (2010-12-08 03:33:40)
Oh common guys I know this isnt as funny as the others but its hard to get "quality response" from emails. As Mike/Mustafi said in FAQ/Disclaimer Most people ignore him. "Only 10% of people I write to write back"
Super Fly (2010-12-08 02:57:14)
Haters gonna hate
anonymous (2010-12-08 02:38:46)
meh
anonymous (2010-12-08 02:26:17)
once again, you have the shittiest fans in the world. they bitch when you dont update and they bitch when you do. why do you even have a comment section? btw this one was great
anonymous (2010-12-08 02:16:04)
hahahahaha :D
megan (2010-12-08 02:00:53)
@jack Whatever, Dishwasher Confusion had me laughing pretty loud.
Josh (2010-12-08 01:33:49)
Give the guy a break. Dude makes something slightly less amusing and you want to crucify him. What do you bungholes create that you can judge so harshly.
just stop (2010-12-08 01:25:40)
it isn't as good as it used to be.
eh (2010-12-08 01:25:02)
not that funny.
Eddie (2010-12-08 01:03:42)
Should have asked him for the phone in the end as if nothing happened, lol.
Jules (2010-12-08 01:01:55)
Haha you just come up with any kind of scenario and it always goes along well. ur awesome :) i bet ur funny to be around
bob (2010-12-08 00:25:29)
fuck the haters, this was a good one. but do it more often, motherfucker
David Thorne (2010-12-08 00:22:14)
Losing your touch.
THANK (2010-12-08 00:21:51)
YOUUUUUU!!!!!!
anonymous (2010-12-08 00:06:09)
jack the fact that you use the word "rubbish" is a dead giveaway that you are british and it explains your shitty sense of humor
Jack (2010-12-08 00:01:55)
the post Disguised Weapons) but I don't think I will be checking up on this page anymore. Dishwasher Confusion and this post are both rubbish
mike (2010-12-07 23:57:36)
Good job! love your work!! very original again!
Jack (2010-12-07 23:56:38)
Wow, a month and a half wait for this? This site has gone a little too far downhill, it doesn't even seem like the same writer. I'm not trying to be ingrateful, as this site has been loads of fun (I even bought the book which sadly doesn't hav
anonymous (2010-12-07 23:54:16)
I love that you still manage to keep these original and hilarious. Keep up the good work!
Michael (2010-12-07 23:53:04)
@Gmailer: Yes, wasn't the best. But it wasn't bad. Besides, he said in the FAQ, that only 10% write back. Maybe most people don't argue anymore, so he started to go direct.
anon (2010-12-07 23:52:51)
loled YOU HAVE MAIL!
Karma (2010-12-07 23:52:50)
I heart you... you always make me laugh :)
anonymous (2010-12-07 23:45:06)
Eh a bit too direct in this one. It wasn't very clever.
Gmailer (2010-12-07 23:42:44)
Big fan, not your best work.
Nick Gurs (2010-12-07 23:38:25)
Hilarious.
Ria (2010-12-07 23:30:28)
bahahahahaha 7.1 surround sound system
anonymous (2010-12-07 23:26:27)
LMFAO the thought of that outlook email noise blasting through your house is cracking me the fuck up

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